You have no idea… (a poem)

Ouch
that hurt
that was triggering
that made me feel sad
But…
then again
you have no idea
how much pain I feel
Because…
it’s concealed
hidden away
pushed deep down
out of sight
out of reach
no one can know
about this pain
inside me
But…
only one has an idea
only God knows

You have no idea

And you never will
even if I explain
myself
and tell you my
life story
you will never
truly understand
what I battle with
on the inside
everyday
without fail
it’s always there
a constant battle

You have no idea

I live
I laugh
I smile
I joke
I act like it’s all okay
But…
deep down
it’s not
at all
I want to die
some days
I have no more strength
to fight another day
But…
somehow I find it
God gives it to me
enough strength
to make it through
another day

And that’s why
You have no idea


I started this battle alone, and I will continue to fight it alone with God because:

I went on this journey of
comparison,
hating myself,
not seeing or feeling God’s love,
feeling defeated,
and unworthy.

But, when I finally realized
how much God truly loves me,
and cares for me (Matthew 6:26-34);

I started to see the world through His eyes,
the beauty around me in nature helped me
realize how much God loves His creations.
And, if He loves the trees, & animals;
How much more could He love me?

And, when I discovered that God loves me more than the trees He created,
I truly understood His amazing love for me!


Thanks for reading! I hope this reminded you that God is always with you, & He cares for all His creations equally (your past does not & will never change His love for you).

-LiveForAdventure! 🙂

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